The End
by UchihaAkaboshi
Summary: Ichimaru Gin - Always smiling, always looking for a chance to infict misery on someone. But maybe behind the cold mask, he was breaking apart inside.


The sun, a blinding sphere of white in the day, but as it sets slowly, it colours everything in the path of its light with a warm orange glow, like the watercolor spreading across the canvas, which is the wonderful blue sky, and the light, puffy clouds that are almost always existent on the cliffs of Rukongai.

The light sketches a path on the calm, dark sea below, too, and sitting on the cliff, I can almost imagine someone above, in the sky, pouring the rich golden paint down like a beautiful waterfall, and the paint diffuses in the sea, mostly following the path, but some still slipping out and spreading out in the sea, almost like it's having its first taste of freedom.

The sight filled me with joy from the time I first saw it, around a year ago, when I first came to this place. It fills me with joy now, too, to this very day.

But the joy is tinged with something dark and bitter, today.

I feel sad that soon I will not be able to see it anymore. That soon I won't be able to see _you_ anymore.

Perhaps forever.

I remember the first time I brought you down to the cliffs. You were annoyed that I brought you out from work again, like I would ever get into trouble for skipping work. Especially not when my Captain was _him_. I hated every day I had to endure with him, the very person I'd sworn to destroy. You don't know, of course, what ghastly memories littered my mind, haunting me, especially the memory of you, lying there, vulnerable because of him.

Because he left you there to starve. You, a young girl, not even a hundredth of his age, with nothing but the torn, tattered clothes you had on. He was a monster within his meek, book-worm mask at that time. But a powerful one. I had no chance of avenging your near-death, the way I was then. That is why I made the sacrifice, to become one of them, the Death Gods, so that I could get stronger. It meant that we had to leave everything we had at that time. True, as orphans, we hadn't much, but still, it was _ours_. And that meant something.

The first time I mock-fought with him, as Death God training, my heart sank. I went at him with everything I got, hoping that any injury I inflicted would be counted as accidental, but he didn't have to lift his bamboo sword at all. He wasn't even serious. He laughed good-naturedly after the training practice, and I laughed along with him, but inside me was a scowl so dark and awful it surprised even me. I knew I had a choice. Avoid him, as my hatred for him directed, and be as hostile as I should to a man who would experiment on a young girl, or pretend to like him as much as everyone, because they couldn't see behind his friendly, cheerful mask.

I made a choice. I had a goal. Destroy him. And the only choice that would allow me to reach my goal… It pained me, but my plan worked. I smiled and laughed and joked my way in until I was finally promoted to Vice Captain. _His_ Vice Captain. Almost all of the Vice-Captain-to-be wanted to be in my position. To be the Vice Captain of the friendliest, most fatherly-like figure in the whole of Sereitei, home of the Death Gods, but I got the job instead, because I showed my potential to him secretly, in the dead of the night when I managed to…let's say, _get rid_ of one of his most prized Death God underlings, which impressed him.

I, among hundreds of candidates, got the job, and I, among hundreds of candidates, was probably the only one who hated his guts.

Sometimes life gets so ironic you can't help but laugh, even if it's a sad laugh.

But that day at the cliff, you were oblivious to all these dark thoughts hiding in my mind, as I kept my everlasting smile plastered on my face. You were still complaining about work, but as soon as you saw the sunset you gasped and the look of wonder and delight was enough to wipe away all the troubles in my mind for a while.

Just for a while.

After that you were the one who dragged me away from work every day to watch the sunset.

But I became increasingly unwilling to go, and I could see you were bewildered. Once, you fell asleep watching the orange glow melt into darkness, and slumped right into my lap. For once I relaxed my plastered-on-grin into what I really felt now, the heart-wrenching grimace spreading across my face, washing away, from my features, any sign of the cheerful me.

I leaned close to her ear and whispered quietly, "I'm sorry for distancing myself from you. But…what would you do if you had to leave someone forever?" The unspoken words in my mind hung in the silence. _What else would you have left to do?_

Being closer together, it's only going to hurt more when you're ripped apart from the other half of you.

_He_ made his move very soon after. The time we had left was never enough to end my unquenchable thirst for you. No one expected him to be the villain, and it was a devastating shock to everyone, but to you, I could see that the shock was more because I was his ally.

You were gritting your teeth when you caught my hand and put your sword to my throat. You thought I couldn't notice. When have I ever not noticed something about you; all your little habits and vices, the way I can always tell you were frightened because your hands tremble a bit, the movement almost too slight to see, and your brows knit together like you're frustrated, but you're really scared inside.

I see all of these symptoms, and its ripping me apart inside that you're afraid of _me_. I wish I could tell you it's alright, everything's alright, and that the good side would win, I would kill him and we could see each other again.

Everything's going to be alright.

There was a tremor in my voice even as I said it in my head. There was a very big chance that I wouldn't win.

Currently I was _with _the bad side. And I had you as my enemy now.

I almost thought about giving up; to hell with killing him, I was happy with being with you, but the beam of light shot down, enclosing me and I knew it was too late to tell you that. This light was the dark magic only the dark side could perform. It shielded the user, and all the user's allies. I heard someone say, "Once they're enclosed in the light, it's impossible to touch them."

I was sorry for so many things, for keeping you in the dark, for betraying you like this, for everything. But I had no time. I was already beginning to rise, about to float higher and higher, till I was out of sight, into the portal, into another universe where he could work on the "magic" sphere of unimaginable power that he had just stolen.

So I turned, stared at you, and forced out a small, sad smile. You had long let go of me, as soon as the barrier of light sealed you off.

"If only," I managed to choke out, "you had managed to hold on to me for a little longer." You looked confused and scared, like the time I found you on the ground after he had finished with you. "Goodbye, Rangiku." I said with an air of finality that scared even myself. " I'm sorry."

Then I was gone.

The bitter coppery taste in my mouth and the cold rain drops on my face jolted me back to consciousness.

The battle I had been waiting for, for over a century. I had a chance at killing him. I was so close. I was almost sure I had won the battle.

I lost.

My vision blurred, and ink drops of blackness blotted out the image, but I could see you, your face contorted with despair. It wasn't rain drops at all. Tears.

I tried to speak but no words came out, but a choked gasp. The image was fading away.

"So-rry-" I managed to say. She shook her head and enclosed me in her arms.

"I knew you wouldn't betray us…me." Her body shook as she sobbed, and it hurt, but I smiled.

She trusted me.

The smile was effortless even though it was hard to breathe.

As I faded, I regretted nothing. Not even giving up my life. Because I knew I gave it up for her.

She matters the most.

Even in the end.


End file.
